Iris
by littlepinkbook
Summary: My first songfic - angsty and a bit dark


Please forgive me

Iris

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By Littlepinkbook

Authors' Note – This is my first songfic, it's based around the song of the same title by the Goo Goo Dolls with phrases lifted from the song interspersed throughout the piece for good measure. 

DISCLAIMER - I own neither Arnold, Helga nor the song Iris.

Rated – PG

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I don't want the world to see me 

Coz' I don't think that they'd understand

Everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am…

"I just want you to know who I am", whispered Helga. Standing alone, as usual, outside the boarding house. The sun was just dipping below the horizon and the last rays of evening light bathed the small girl in a warm, orange glow that bounced off of her blond tresses turning them a burning gold.

She clutched her precious locket to her breast, the trinket rising slowly as she inhaled deeply, trying to steady the tide of her silent sobs. They racked her shoulders gently as fat, salty tears rolled down her cheeks. 

The evening air was sweet and a cool breeze stirred causing the soft skin of Helga's cheeks to stiffen as the wet streaks on her face dried.

"The more I disguise my true self the more I push you away. You, the one and only person I know who can make me happy in a world that strives to crush me" continued Helga, whispering her reverie aloud to ears that could not hear her.

She slid down the wall and sat on the hard concrete, staring up her loves' bedroom window. She sighed a weighted, lonely sigh. Lowering her head to look into the artificially reproduced eyes of the boy causing her such torment she spied a broken, glass bottle discarded in the alley, just beside her.

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When everything feels like the movies

You bleed to just know you're alive

With trembling fingers and an air of uncertainty she picked up the dangerously sharp object and examined it – contemplating something that had crossed her mind a million times before.

//Physical pain goes away// she thought with clouded judgement.

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And I'd give up forever to touch you

For I know that you feel me somehow…

Somewhere in his room Arnold jerked suddenly, distracted from the book he was reading. A shudder of absolute dread had rushed down his spine, disturbing him deeply; he wasn't sure what it was but something in the pit of his stomach nagged at him.

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And sooner or later it's over

I just don't wanna lose you tonight

Helga stared in shock at the red liquid oozing from the tips of her fingers; there was a horrible numbness all over her body. The physical pain may go away but it certainly doesn't take the emotional with it – it just left behind this god-awful aftermath – this agonising numbness.

//I just want to feel something, anything// thought the blonde.

She clutched her wrist, the blood trickling down in tiny rivers to her palms; it all seemed so surreal.

She jumped suddenly when the sound of a familiar voice snapped her back to this world.

"Helga?" Breathed Arnold, his emerald eyes wide with horror.

"Arnold! I – I…" Stammered the frightened little girl, feeling like a deer caught in headlights. She was caught with no where to run – her mind a blank as how to explain her current state.

But before she could make to escape the young boy had rushed to her aid, and grasped her injured hands not caring that they bloodied his own.

"Oh my God – Helga what happened?" He gasped, scared and concerned, examining the wounds. 

She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out – there was nothing she could say – tears began to well in her eyes. He was so concerned about her, truly afraid for her welfare. It made her heart burst, all her emotions had met in a junction and jammed. No coherent thought or speech could she grasp.

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All I can taste is this moment

And all I can breath is your life

After further inspection Arnold's brow furrowed – the wounds were very odd and comprehension soon blossomed in him that these cuts were no accident. His countenance hardened like stone and emerald locked with sapphire. 

//There is so much pain in her – it could engulf her, I think it may already have. She needs me – it's funny, I feel like I need her too// thought Arnold, reading it all from her eyes.

"Come inside, Helga" he pleaded, tipping his head towards the boarding house. "Let me help you…"

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You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't wanna go home right now

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Fin

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End file.
